We've
been living in Sandton Central, Johannesburg for almost two months now. Despite
housing the headquarters of numerous major corporations, there is little going
on here and I'm going to go out there and say it loud and proud - this is
probably the most soulless place I've ever lived in. This week we are finally
breaking free, so as a farewell to this strange era I've listed up the most
notable features of our 'life' in Sandton CBD.
1. Hydropark
This is the 'luxury apartment complex'
where we have been living in a seemingly endless flat-waiting purgatory. I
wouldn't complain about this at all if it weren't for the fact that we have
also spent at least four months living out of our suitcases in other temporary
accommodation during the visa-waiting purgatory.
Notable features of Hydropark:
- They clean the place all the
time - hotel style - and they also do our laundry constantly, even if it's only
a few pairs of pants and socks in the basket.
- There's an immaculate swimming pool
with three barbecues (braai). Nobody ever uses either of these things, ever.
- The capped internet. Don't get me
started on this crappy internet...
2.
Nelson
Mandela Mall
Outside of Hydropark I spend an
uncomfortably large amount of time at this massive shopping centre (where the
husband's office is). Being probably one of the biggest malls in the country
you would think you could buy pretty much anything here. The only thing I have
not been able to find here is a computer shop. But clothes, food, books,
dry-cleaning, hair-dressers, shoe-repair, dentist, banks, rifles, fridges,
coins with Nelson Mandela's head on...they have all of that.
Notable features:
- Giant statue of Nelson Mandela
- Joyful, joyful - the Sandton
library! It's actually rather good. Just bring a proof of address and passport
to join.
- Restaurants, loads of them. Stand
outs are the Wangthai and the Butchery. For snacks it has to be Bread Basket.
Duds include the hugely greasy Trumps Grill.
3. The Bar
There are loads of restaurants in the
aforementioned mall, but strangely only one bar. This bar due to its proximity
to the office is our de-facto after-work bar. The other things it has going for
it are the sports on TV, indoor smoking and...ah I pretty much ran out of
things.
On the shady side the supervisors seem
to be complete bastards and are often seen publicly shouting down the wait
staff in a pretty humiliating manner and there are always hookers hanging
around. Oh and the house music gets really loud. Caffe della Salute is certainly no Silvers, but it will have
to do.
4. Delhi Dhabar
Tucked in next to the Benmore Gardens
Mall (where the supermarket is) is a small strip of restaurants, ranging from
super luxe to Fish and Chips. In between it all you have Delhi Dhabar which is
a great Indian restaurant. There's also a strange little Lebanese shop and cafe
which does a fine business in nargile smoking pipes.
5. The bus stop
I walk past this bus stop on the corner of West Street and Grayston Drive every day
and I still don't really get what this is about. I mean, surely love is the
bottom line, no? Conundrum.
Between 15:30 and 17:30 there are
hoards of people waiting here for the buses which head directly all the way
over to Soweto in the south-west.
Love sits way above the bottom line |
6. The robots
South Africans call traffic lights
'robots' here. I like that. As for the robots themselves...bloody hate 'em.
With not much 'street life' going on in Sandton people just tend to hurtle
through the main streets of this area. Watching the robots changing colours and
then preparing to dash across the cross-sections here is an uncomfortable game
of chicken.
Just another Sandton street |
7. The hotels
Hidden behind the big walls here are
some very fancy hotels. So far I have only infiltrated a few, of which these
are probably my favourites:
The Balalaika – for the name
obviously. Also nice restaurant.
The Maslow – I went here for the
Internations event and was very impressed by what lies out the back. A
beautifully lit pool, surrounded by palm trees, looked over by some minimalist
glass fronted cocktail bars and lounges. Glam.
The Radisson Gautrain – you wouldn’t
know from the front but it has a roof terrace with a pool. The view is much of
a muchness, but the general atmosphere is unexpectedly fancy.
Outside the Citibank building on West
Street is the rank for Sandton's tuk tuks – Shesha tuks. They only travel a
maximum of 10kms from Sandton (for 55Rand) so are perfect for short trips which
would actually wind up costing you more if went the Gautrain plus bus route.
For example you can get to Illovo Junction (home of Wolves Cafe and the Griffin
Pub) for just 30Rand.
If you do go the tuk tuk route (and I
would recommend you do) you need a map, as they never know where they are
going. Also time your trip. Tuk tuks have a maximum speed of 40km p.h so it is
pretty easy to figure out if they are trying to rip you off, which they will
be.
Tuk tuks stop working at around 20:00.
9. Gautrain
Of course the best thing about
Sandton is the Gautrain. It takes you straight into Braamfontein and the CBD in
just 10minutes. I would seriously be lost without my trusty escape Sandton
lifeline. Thank you Gautrain!
I couldn't agree more. Sandton is a pretty crappy place. They say it's a business heart of Africa. Well, certainly you wouldn't say that when looking at the huge potholes on the roads.
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